Stalin Orders Everyone Out Of The Pool

The invisible doomed disqualified death’s head who has decreed she will serve as the second noggin upon the mutant 2016 presidential Bushton body Wednesday morning Decided that the results of a Poll released by NBC shall Command that all Democrats must immediately cease javolrunning against her, or else be Liquidated.

The Poll allegedly showed that 69% of Democrats in New Hampshire, seems they Want her; in Iowa, she is Wanted by about 68% of Democrats; and in South Carolina, she is some 48% Beyond the nearest Democratic challenger.

“All the other Democrats will Quit Now,” Stalin spokeswoman Alegre Riverdaughter told Bedlam News. “Or we will march on a road of their bones.”

Also on the List of the Dead is David Axelrod, who formerly worked for The Black Man, and who has written a book that contains some Mean things about The Stalin.

“Why would you be undercutting your party’s next candidate?” a Stalin apparatchik moaned about Axelrod’s wanton public Trotskyist heresy.

“It’s not helpful, and it’s definitely not appreciated,” said another henchman. “Frankly, he is Dead.”

Informed Sources indicate that the Stalin campaign is furiously manufacturing and distributing to The Faithful blazingly sharp ice-axes with which the Brains of Deviationists may be Penetrated.

“We came, we saw, they died,” Stalin cackled gleefully.

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