Damselflies Duke It Out Over Dirt Clods

The inaptly named Shebaa Farms is a seven-mile-long by two-mile-wide strip of land that consists of stones, dirt clods, and thistles. Though it barely exists, it is furiously claimed as “MINE!” by the the dirt patchscreeching baboons running Syria, and Israel, and Lebanon. Occasionally the baboons send out hapless minions to die for the greater glory of Wanting this land. Because, don’t cha know, everyone wants to go under the ground having died for stones, thistles, dirt clods.

The most recent madness involving this disputed dust-wallow commenced when Israeli planes killed six Lebanese soldiers and an Iranian general in Qunaitra, a town in the Syrian sliver of the Golan Heights (the Heights are where the Shebaa thistle-expanse is located).

The Hezbollah version of Lebanon then sent anti-tank missiles into an Israeli military convoy patrolling the stones of Shebaa, killing two and wounding seven.

Israel next fired into Lebanon, a Three Stooges-like strike that succeeded only in killing a Spanish peacekeeper deployed by the United Nations.

All the baboons were by this time in full shriek.

Sayyed Hasan Nasrallah of Hezbollah bellowed: “After what happened in Qunaitra and in the Shebaa Farms Wednesday, you have tried us. Don’t try us again. If the Israeli enemy thinks that the resistance fears war, I tell them today in the commemoration of the Qunaitra martyrs and after the Shebaa qualitative operation that we don’t fear war and we are not reluctant to face it, and we will face it if it is imposed on us, and we will win it, God willing.”

Could he stop there? No.

“Following the Qunaitra operation and the response in the Shebaa Farms, I want to be clear: We in the Islamic Resistance [Hezbollah] in Lebanon are no longer concerned with any such thing as the rules of engagement. We don’t recognize the rules of engagement that have ended,” a seemingly yeehawdefiant and relaxed Nasrallah said.

“It is our religious, moral, humanitarian and legal right to face aggression, wherever and whenever it may occur. The story that you hit me here and you retaliate here is finished,” he added, speaking through a huge screen via a video link. “We have the right to respond in any place and at any time and in the way we deem as appropriate.”

The Hezbollah chief said the Israeli attack in Qunaitra revealed the unity between Beirut, Damascus and Tehran.

“The martyrs who fell in Qunaitra reflected a fusion of Lebanese-Iranian blood on Syrian territory, and also reflected the unity of the cause and the unity of the fate and the battle of these countries [against Israel],” he said. “When blood unites Palestine, Lebanon, Syria and Iran, then we will enter an era of victory.”


Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu meanwhile loudly hallucinated that the Hezbollah attack on the Shebaa thistle-patch was the work of Iran. Because this deludo believes everything Wrong the work of Iran. When the man experiences an unsatisfactory bowel movement, he gets on the horn and screams into the earhole of some Republican in the US Congress that Iran must be showered with bombs.

“For some time, Iran—via Hezbollah—has been trying to establish an additional terrorist yahoo yippityfront against us from the Golan Heights,” said Netanyahu. “We are taking strong and responsible action against this attempt.”

Hezbollah took responsibility for Wednesday’s attack on two IDF vehicles on Israel’s northern border. But a source in the Prime Minister’s Office bluntly accused Iran of helping Hezbollah behind the scenes.

“Iran is behind this heinous terrorist attack—the same Iran that the world powers are forming an agreement with, that would allow it to maintain its ability to acquire nuclear weapons capacity,” the source said.

A baboon in Iran also felt it necessary to stick his oar in:

“We told the Americans that the leaders of the Zionist regime should await the consequences of their act,” Iran’s Deputy Foreign Minister Hossein Amir Abdollahian said.

People waited several days to see whether these idjits would engage in a full-out war over the thistles and stones and dirt clods, as they did in 2006. But apparently this latest outburst of madness is now “over.” Looks like some of the saner apes have, for the nonce, prevailed.

Israel said it had received a message from UNIFIL, the U.N. peacekeeping force in Lebanon, that Hezbollah was not interested in further escalation.

In Beirut, a Lebanese source briefed on the situation told Reuters that Israel informed Hezbollah via UNIFIL “that it will make do with what happened yesterday and it does not want the battle to expand”.

Okay then.

All that needs to be known about this nonsensical nuttery over the thistles is expressed below by the wise man Ruben Bolling. In truth, it perfectly expresses dirt-conflict not only in the Middle East, but in all and everywhere.



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