In Command Here

The nation’s premier serial killers are now whining and crying and weeping and moaning that the federal government may no longer be able to fully fund, to the obscene brim, to that level that they would supremely like, their deeply darkened Thanatos bliss of stab and shoot and strafe and slit.

These serial killers are openly and publicly blubbering that the so-called “sequester” might mean that they might no longer be as “ready” to blow all the limbs partyoff a five-year-girl, cave in the skull of an old woman, or instantly evaporate the innards of some barely-bearded boy.

According to a furiously violin-playing piece in the Washington Post, these serial killers, also known as “the U.S. military’s service leaders,” have “begun painting a stark picture of the toll a congressionally mandated budget cut could take on the readiness of the world’s largest armed forces.”

To which, my question, is this: why would any even marginally-evolved human possibly want these people to be “ready” ?

For their “readiness” involves killing people and breaking things.

What human, evolved even an inch beyond the monolith, would ever want such a “ready” thing to be?

Any being, evolved beyond even pond scum, would quite naturally want these people to be as thoroughly “unready” as possible.

But no.

According to the Post, the serial killer General Ray Odierno, mass murderer in charge of the US Army, death-ejaculates that “the cuts may curtail training for 80 percent of ground forces, including some in the deployment pipeline, forcing him to extend the deployments of troops already in Afghanistan.”

The serial killers in charge of the US Navy meanwhile death-ejaculate that “the Navy has delayed the deployment of the USS Harry Truman, leaving just one aircraft carrier instead of two in the Persian Gulf, where tensions continue with Iran. The budget crunch also will mean delays for repairs of a carrier and the construction of another. ”

And the serial killers in charge of the US Air Force death-ejaculate that “slashing $12.4 billion from its budget for the remainder of the fiscal year would require cutting 200,000 flying hours. That means that by May, two-thirds of the force’s pilots would ‘drop below acceptable level of readiness,’ Air Force chief Mark Welsh told lawmakers recently.”

What is the problem with these people? We evolved humans want them to  “drop below [an] acceptable level of readiness.”

Because their “acceptable level of readiness” means let's gothey can continue to joyfully spew death-sperm as they blow all the limbs off a five-year-girl, cave in the skull of an old woman, and instantly evaporate the innards of some barely-bearded boy.

None of these sad sadsack ur-people are necessary. The United States is at peace with its neighbors, Canada and Mexico. Thus, as I have repeatedly pointed out, like Cassandra in the chariot on her way to the bloody baths, the country needs no Army. No Navy. No Marines. No Air Force

All these serial killers, they are so old. So in the way.

It is long past time that they unslung their weapons and went out and got real jobs and started helping their fellow humans.

They are the scourge of this planet.

They are so over.

They are all going to go.

And, of course, the first to go, shall be all the dark murderous introvert impotent “special forces.” Who, as is the nature of who they are, are currently out and about raping and torturing and murdering, there in Afghanistan.

Hoo-rah. Semper fi. Anchors aweigh. Fly the friendly skies. Get down and dirty. Fuck us some skulls.

But heh. Don’t dare “sequester” even a dollar, that might go to these people. Because there’s a world of skulls out there, that need to be fucked. And woe betide those, who’d deny these “heroes” the coin, enabling them to, ever-failing, try to slip the sad saggy shriveled thing, in.

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5 Responses to “In Command Here”


  1. 1 Mike Lambert February 25, 2013 at 4:59 am

    We had a beautiful snowstorm , not much accumulation , perhaps four inches , but the tree branches are outlined with fluff. I have a full day of painting ahead in this room, looking out at the woods, It’s nice, I think my darling will be working at home today too, that’s very nice.
    Reading your piece after the weekend news about death squads actually has made the day even better.
    Someone else feels the same, I am not alone. I can’t discuss such news with my bride. It’s not a fault by any means , it’s just she cannot take a steady diet of such horror, so she turns away from me.
    That’s not good,for me.
    The continued prosecution of War, forward deployments( we are the only ones that do this ) is completely tangled with civilian jobs .
    Some must hope that there is need for more hellfire missiles every day.

    • 2 mieprowan February 25, 2013 at 10:02 am

      Hi Mike. I’m old enough to remember the sixties, when even conforming to the requirements of the draft was frowned upon by some of us who identified as other than Republicans. All this casual encouragement of an all-volunteer military is horrifying indeed.

      When Winston Churchill was asked how history should name WWII, he promptly responded “The unneccessary war.” If WWII could have been averted with more sophisticated international action, where does that leave us now? And what can possibly be the honor in any of it?

      Yes, the blog owner here encourages speaking truth about these matters. It’s refreshing.

  2. 3 mieprowan February 25, 2013 at 9:55 am

    But if our military did not keep the entire world terrorized, corporations would not be able to pay brown children in Asia seventy cents a day to make Nice Things. If we Americans are good servants to these corporations, we may even get paid enough to buy ourselves a six hundred dollar Nice Thing once in awhile. Unlike the brown children in Asia. And the dead ones. All the fewer to steal our Nice Things!

  3. 4 mieprowan February 25, 2013 at 9:30 pm

    Reblogged this on There Are So Many Things Wrong With This and commented:
    Now that we’re letting out all the stops..

  4. 5 alexadiaz27 March 3, 2013 at 5:59 pm

    i’m not making this up. i’m not that good a writer or that imaginative or (thank heaven) whatever. just today on the GOS in a discussion with a survivor of a school shooting, we were talking about what might constitute a “responsible gun owner.” (i.e. single lady living alone in high crime area, possibly previous victim of DV or stalking, and threats.)

    i was informed (not by the survivor but an esteemed RKBA moron, that when i was raped, as undoubtedly i will be, i should pee myself to “give the rapist less pleasure.”

    no low is too low for the gun fanatics. they would literally stop at nothing to keep their toys that kill.


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