Words That, If I Use Them: Shoot Me

I became Old Man Shouts At Cloud at a too early age.

In my very early 20s. When I was first assaulted by the word “facilitate.”

To this day, I do not know what that word actually “means.”

And that is the problem. For the word doesn’t “mean” anything. It is a no-word. A word invoked solely to cover Crime.

From its first appearance in my life, to its last, it has functioned but as a signal that I am about being Robbed.

Of money, or, most often, of the space to create.

Through a series of no coincidences, that it would be too much of a tangent to here relate, I had, very early on, read my Orwell—the Real stuff, the essays—and so was attuned, long before “facilitate” was thrust in my face, to the mustering of words to conceal, like squid-ink, Assaults.

“Facilitate” just means that somebody—I suspect a sort of machine, having taken human form—is about stealing from me.

Next, not too many years later, came “mic.”

This, a product of knuckledragging. De-evolved ’80s drooler musicians who, perceiving the English stamped imprint above one of the holes in their amps—”mic”—believed that to be the proper abbreviation for “microphone.”

No. There had emerged, decades before, a perfectly serviceable, and apt, abbreviation for microphone—”mike.”

I know that this—the fuggin amps—is where the pre-monolith “mic” came from. Because I had played off the same sort of goddam amps for years.

But this was the era of “punk.” When it was actually a Crime to, say, be able to play your instrument.

Once, I recall, when reviewing a punk band, I made the mistake of observing that a woman had mastered the guitar.

When my piece appeared, she was summarily heaved out of the band. Run out of town like a three-legged dog. While letters flowed into the paper suggesting that I be lynched in the County Square.

Similarly, familiarity with the English language was considered so “uncool” that anybody who even spoke of such a thing needed to, at the very least, be dropped down a well.

Thus, “mic,” drooling, knuckles dragging, displaces “mike.” So that, today, imbecility and illiteracy has so overrun the land, that, now, these days, “mic” is considered the appropriate abbreviation for “microphone.” While “mike” makes the majorly portion of English-speaking humans just scratch their heads.

“What dat mean?”

And I—I, am a man without a language.

For, to this day, whenever I encounter “mic,” in any piece of writing, I immediately turn the page: that piece is dead to me.

There are many more such examples. But I will not bore you with them here. For no one likes to listen to an old man, shout at clouds.

However, in an attempt to try to coerce you past the “furthur,” I will say that, therein, lies fevered jeremiads against two word-formations that have metastasized across the nation, since the re-election of the black man: “pivot,” and “fiscal cliff.”

“Pivot” is, to me, a word that does not refer to human beings.

Fewer words are so cold and contrived and awkward and mechanical.

A robot may pivot. But not a flesh-and-blood human being.

I loathed the word when it was invoked, Lakers-era, to reference a move in basketball. A move that rendered humans mechanical.

“Pivot” is a machine place. A place less than human.

Today we hear, in the second term of the black man, that the United States has decided to “pivot” towards Asia.

What this means is that Al Qaeda and various other associated Crazed Brown People have become, both to the American people, and to the Masters Of War, boring.

And so there must be a new Menace. And, lo, China, already identified, more than a decade ago, pre Atta-into-the-towers, as the Next Menace—China shall serve quite well.

And so all the creaky robots, they shall pivot—ships steaming, planes flying, spies snooping—towards frowning darkly, upon the yellow man. As well as the brown man.

From the nation presided over by the black man.

Wonder why his hair got gray so fast? Wonder those poisoned-blood bags under his eyes? Wonder the wrinkles? The parchment skin?

Wonder not.

Kabuki. Not his. But he is, fingered, as Director.

Jackie Robinson died, for Americans’ old and in the way sins. So will this man.

And so, we arrive at “fiscal cliff.”

Absolutely totally important complete bullshit.

My colleague—so sorry, but she’s a genius—observed that, in that brief post-coital period, following the vote-returns November 6, already The People, right and left, were ginning up, fight-or-flight, to get Extremely Concerned, about This, That, and The Other.

They could not live, these people—right or left—unless their hair was actually, continuously, on fire.

A student of brain science, my colleague, she perceived that, especially there on the intertubes, but also on radio and TV and in the treesheets, there was happening an addiction thing, an atavistic fight-or-flight deal, where people developed a serious jones—where there must, always, blooming from out of them, come some sort of Outrage, over which they could in turn express their Outrage.

And so, though one might reasonably expect that, after the election returns November 6 at last arrived, there might be at least a bit of a respite: no. Instead, the lizard-brain fight-or-flight had, by the very next day, or at least the day after, moved into Warp 10 ululation about: (1) the pee-pee of David Petraeus; (2) the nimrodness of Israel; and (3), the Doomsville of the “fiscal cliff.”

And so, while prior to the re-election of the black man, there was little discussion of any “fiscal cliff,” upon his re-ascension, “fiscal cliff” became all there is.

New heroin. Into the veins. All we hear about. Avid. Always. To feed the jones.

As see, there above, the chart, tracking the these-days mention of this “fiscal cliff” heroin, as compared to the 2010-2011 “debt ceiling” heroin. No comparison. The jones. Heavier. Moving. More extreme. All there is.

Excuse me. Needful here, to shoot up.

The “fiscal cliff” thing is about money. Which means I can’t take it all that seriously.

Money is new: invented only in 7000 BCE.

And now, today, almost over.

More than five times as much money as exists in the world, is currently owed in debt.

That is not sustainable.

Eventually the humans will see this.

Once the humans ate LSD, and looked at their hand, and saw right through it. So too will they look at their hand, with money in it, and see right through it.

Money is over; money is done.

The final manifestation, before we swirl up and out, will be the money, with my lover’s face upon it.

I don’t care if that makes sense to you.

For money makes no sense. And I make more sense than money.

In this being—these beings, alpha and omega, terrestrial and extraterrestrial—there is no pivot. There is, instead, only love.

That there is this nonsense now, about taxes and Medicare and Social Security and debt limits and reserve currencies, as the American Century sinks, as is its rightful fate, beneath the waves—in the histories, when they come to be written, all of these will be minor matters. As compared to how many humans became to walk upright. In love.

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39 Responses to “Words That, If I Use Them: Shoot Me”


  1. 1 possum November 29, 2012 at 4:20 am

    Modern day abuse of the human language runs rampant. Where ever did education and attention to proper wording go? The pain of hearing much of what you mention and what is omitted is too much to bear many days. English may not be a perfect language in many ways but bending an imperfect structure only makes for worsening functionality.

    • 2 bluenred November 29, 2012 at 4:57 pm

      There can’t be education in America; otherwise the children won’t believe that Adam and Eve rode dinosaurs to church. You know that, possum. ; )

    • 3 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 12:50 pm

      Dr. P, so good to see you. i hope you are well and happy. sending you hugs. i miss you more than words can say.

  2. 4 Comrade Red November 29, 2012 at 7:29 am

    cats lie, dogs tell the truth, and my pet is “deploy”, meaning “put”… honestly, one begins to suspect that the function of language for humans is control by means of deception…

  3. 6 Miep O'Brien November 29, 2012 at 12:18 pm

    “Interface” and “impact” used as verbs. “Free reign.” “Comprise” misused instead of “compose” or “constitute.” Tacking “-ize” on the end of a word instead of making the effort to construct a proper phrase. Remember when “sadist” was pronounced with a short “a?” As it should be?

    • 7 bluenred November 29, 2012 at 4:56 pm

      Good ones all.

    • 8 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 1:14 pm

      hola, Miep!

      • 9 Miep O'Brien November 30, 2012 at 1:58 pm

        Hello to you too, though I must admit I am not familiar with your handle,

        • 10 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 2:11 pm

          Alexa, aka Avila (which was my maiden name, when i found blogs). how are you?

          • 11 Miep O'Brien November 30, 2012 at 2:36 pm

            That would have been my guess, but when people use multiple handles it is generally not because they want them publicly associated.

            I’m all right, thanks for asking. Better in some ways. I spend a lot of time doing chores. Adopted more animals. I have a three year old border collie-great Pyranees cross who is a really awesome, very laid back dog, and I’ve been fostering kittens. I still have four, they’re about five months, and may well keep them all, as the local populace went into an unprecedent fit of late season cat breeding.

            I read a lot. I’m currently reading an English translation of Jose Saramago’s “The Cave.” It’s slow going, like reading poetry.

            Life has been treating you well, I hope?

            • 12 santera hoochie December 1, 2012 at 9:46 am

              Miep, i remember seeing photos of your border collie. he’s adorable.

              sounds like you’ve been busy. i must say i admire you for adopting, or fostering the kittens. (i’ve never understood cats, but admire people who do.)

              and Saramago is poetry in any language, no?

              i’ve been a fussy, feverish crybaby this week (what is a mild case of strep throat, in the big picture? sinverguenza.) the big bad (no white cells, only a few platelets) are the real problem, the door that opened and invited the strep to c’mon in and make itself at home, but it changes nothing. i’m tired of it, all of it. (sorry. TMI.)

              Miep, did you know Articles About Hillary Clinton’s Hair Are Why We Can’t Have Nice Things? shocking and hard to believe on first blush, but it does actually make sense, in a sideways sense. ;)

              • 13 Miep O'Brien December 1, 2012 at 6:23 pm

                I still have my border collie Casey, Falcor is a new and larger addition. I don’t claim to understand cats, but I recall your having a cat, a Bengal. I would love a Bengal, they get Bengal mixes at the shelter sometimes.

                Good news there this week on the cat/kitten front, many adoptions, so one of my five month olds gets to go up on the auction block. I decided to keep the least friendly one, who is probably the smartest one, and also the one with the calmest demeanor, to keep her sister company. I will do more fostering next spring if I don’t suddenly leave.

                Saramogo deserves an entire category of novel devoted to himself. He reminds me a bit of Gabriel Marquez but more in theme than in writing style.

                I’m sorry to hear you’ve been ill. I rarely get respiratory illnesses, for which I am very thankful. I know it can drag a person down terribly and be very disruptive. It’s okay to complain if it helps any. There are big things missing from my life but a lot of them really suck, and illness is surely one of them.

                I’ll go check out that link now.

              • 14 Miep O'Brien December 1, 2012 at 6:33 pm

                Well, yes I had noticed that sexism is not dead. Part of why I’m in a better mood lately is that I finally got myself together to complete the process of ruthlessly ripping out idiots who buy into such oppressive crap from my friendship circle. This has resulted in my friendship circle becoming almost entirely virtual, but much nicer. Also I really like working with the shelter manager, who is quite smart, very nice, giving, and royally pissed off at this community, but handles it all with admirable equanimity. She’s raising her daughter, who is maybe 11, alone. The daughter is a sweet, funny, spontaneous and generally unsullied child and it is really nice to interact with a kid now and then.

  4. 15 Comrade Red November 30, 2012 at 9:33 am

    I get a chuckle out of “impact” – because of the meaning in medical language – roughly speaking, it means constipated.

  5. 19 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    i for one am not interested in Petraeus or whatever he did with his man-thing. more concerning to me is the mystery of Jill Kelly, the so-called “socialite” who summoned agentes del federale and actually got a response . . . for “email harassment.”

    • 20 bluenred November 30, 2012 at 12:58 pm

      She got a response because an FBI agent wanted to put his pee-pee inside her. So he badgered his boys at the bureau to treat her like she was Important. Happens all the time.

      • 21 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 1:04 pm

        i believe you. i honestly do. no other explanation, ‘cuz as you know, the CW on computer crimes is we may track an IP to a physical address, but we cannot ever prove, with anything like certainty, who was on the computer at the time of the alleged incident. so another pee-pee explains like, what no eye-pee address, could ever.

        • 22 bluenred November 30, 2012 at 1:12 pm

          It is said that the cyber-feds looked at the thing and pronounced it “borderline.” But then went ahead. They went ahead because one of their own was pushing it. And he was pushing it because he was trying to impress Kelly. World’s oldest story. “Look: me have big club. Pound all Dangers. Just for you. Want lie down now?”

  6. 30 santera hoochie November 30, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    my biggest objection at the moment is that i know virtually no teenagers or young adults who can resist the impulse to leave the word like out of any sentence or question or even phrase. it like, annoys me. a LOT.

    i sorta want to say, “will you STOP SAYING LIKE when it isn’t like, you have homework but rather, actually have homework or don’t?”

  7. 33 Comrade Red December 1, 2012 at 10:39 am

    Let us not forget “homeland” – and there are more – see the incomplete but vitally interesting Nazi Deutsch. not to flog the book, but even the amazon blurbs are innarestin’ . One phrase left out is einmalig in der geschichte – which H.K.Smith very loosely translated as “never before in history” – implying that the nazi apparatus was doing great things because they’d never been done before.

  8. 34 bluenred December 2, 2012 at 2:08 pm

    I must confess that I have never viewed Pi, Ms. Hoochie. I am very behind on my films. ; (

  9. 35 Comrade Red December 6, 2012 at 9:50 am

    The real semantic value of some terms is illuminating as to Policy. What they say tells you what they’re going to do. For example, they say “extrajudicial execution”. That’s obviously an oxymoron – it has zero meaning by itself, but they use the term – so there is meaning associated. From context it means that they’re saying that murder is legal when some people, but not others, do it, if they say so. By implication they’re saying that ukase and law are the same thing and that “rights” are whatever they don’t forbid.

  10. 37 Julia Rain (the deviant daughter) December 10, 2012 at 12:38 am

    All this Fiscal Cliff talk keeps reminding me of how, when you’d take me hiking I would, wrongly, describe the scenery as “cliffs”, which led to my mom squaking, so you had to painstakingly teach me the difference between a “cliff” and a “slope”. These people need to learn the difference, too. :)

    • 38 bluenred December 10, 2012 at 7:29 am

      Ah yes. The famous maternal Cliff Fear. As you note, sometimes a cliff is just a slope. And it is also important to remember that nobody has to go over the thing, be it cliff or slope. You just head in a different direction. ; )


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