Howling mobs of enraged art-lovers are today marching on that satanic citadel of pure evil known as deviantART, ululating in holy outrage at the infamous anathema in which my daughter was awarded second prize in a deviantART poetry contest, rather than first.
“This shall not stand!” Yahweh thundered, in a fervent burst of righteous wrath, making a rare public 
appearance before a roomful of startled reporters. “An injustice has been done—yea, verily: one worse, even, than what I did to Job. This decision violates all standards of God and Man, and tempts Me to bring on The Fire Next Time.”
While various lesser deities strive mightily to restrain the enraged celestial brimstone-brewer, the earthside hacker collective known as Anonymous has vowed to publicly reveal the names, addresses, phone numbers, genomes, and underpants sizes of all involved in the anathema.
Remarks by the dissed daughter herself (“Oh no, no bombs!” she pleaded to a cell of the Weather Underground, one that had reconstituted specifically to bomb all those involved in the anathema who need to be bombed, “I actually really loved the poem that got first place, and thought it really deserved to win”) are to be disregarded.
This is because “it is Known that she has always been Nice,” said her father, busily attaching a timer. “And as can be seen: here in this world, this world that is Wrong, nice people finish second.”
Earlier installations in the saga of the deviant daughter are as follows.
Here is some background on her daughterness. Here is where her deviant proclivities were initially exposed. Here is where she first became an award-winning deviant, acknowledged as both “Author Of The Month,” and authoress of “Poem Of The Month.” Here is a deviant poem of hers I published last December, when snow was suffocating all the land. Here is a different-one poem of hers that also won a deviant award.
Here is her deviant page.
And here is the poem that most recently finished second, of 128 entries. But really finished first. On the Earth where there is no anathema.
No matter what others may think Deviant Daughter will always be number one in Possum Valley.
Congratulations to the Deviant Daughter for winning anything at all. Us marsupials do not foray into that world of esoteric word play known as poetry but we have great admiration for those with the skill and courage to do so.
Yes, but you write about Science. And people should go over to the Orange Place, every Monday, to receive your wisdom.
Thanks for the plug. The GOS may not be everyone’s favorite spot but the flame free zone is open on Monday these days. Just finishing the installment for tomorrow right this minute. Lots of exciting stuff to share as always.
Are you breaking the story of how NASA wants to dose its astronauts with zombie powder? Or that Ronald Reagan now robs people in Florida, in his zombiedom? Revealing that Ric Perry is a failed Dr. Moreau experiment, an experiment that sought to cross a man with a steer? Exposing the strange and terrifying messages sent by humanoids to the hapless inhabitants of Gliese 581g? Noting that people now place cellphones before the nostrils of expiring persons, rather than mirrors, to definitively determine whether they have passed on? Recounting the Reality that “a German produces on average twice the feces of a Frenchman”? Reviling the Outrage of the “nanny plate”? Posting the way-bitchin’ Garan video?
These are all Vitally Important stories from out of Science Land. ; )
All important stuff for sure, Science Man. It is good you keep those stories alive for the Googles.
Thank you, possum! That’s very kind.
My deviantART page informs me that it will soon be your birthday, and since your deviantART profile page informs me that you last signed into your deviantART account 57 weeks ago, I shall wish you an early Happy Birthday here.
Darned art spies.
At my age birthdays are no longer really counted. My wife is making a big deal but for me it is one more day.
Sorry not to be a more regular attender at deviantArt but life is pretty well filled these days. Online time has to be managed pretty carefully these days.
Always a pleasure seeing your smiling face around these parts. Take good care of yourself.
Ha! The art spies have caught you out. You be having a birthday.
Here are many young people, wishing you a happy birthday, in many languages.
Awwwww. That is too darned cute.
Not today but soon another year will be celebrated among those who count such things. Marsupials prefer not to be enumerators but celebrations are always a good thing.
Ooh, art spy sounds like an exciting job! Do I get to wear a beret?
Not just a beret but camoflage suit and large combat boots. Nothing but the best for our favorite Art Spy. Maybe Science Man can even find a cloak of invisibility or a suit of invincibility to go along with the outfit.
I don’t know that she’d look good in combat boots. And, living where she does, if she donned camo, they’d put a rifle in her hands and tell her she has to go out and hunt deer. : /
Reminds me of some folks up her way (or not far away). They gave their 4-year-old son a rifle and a permanent hunting license as those are legal for the very young. Needless to say we in Possum Valley are appalled. But in some circles a gun is a necessary part of growing up. Sad.
Combat boots would be good. They’re kind of big with weird, anti-social girls for some reason. Sadly I think Dad is right about the camo. But I’d love an invisibility cloak. Or suit. I’m not picky.
With any luck your errant father will supply a cloak, he is after all the resident Scienc Man. Invisibility is a fine thing under the right circumstances.
Of course. All good art spies wear berets. ; )
Excellent.
I didn’t mean to be an art spy. But I still hope you enjoy your day. And thank you! You take care of yourself too.
You are one more among the cherished brats in my life these days, Miss Julia. Got M&M’s from another one, a phone call from yet another, and singing Happy Birthday from a group of the same young folks at the office. Life is made so much better by the brats who bring real joy along time to time.
Then I am happy to be a cherished brat.
I love how Yahweh is so enraged that my poem which is a prayer to the Dark Mother Goddess did not win. He’s really tolerant these days, it seems. Except, of course, when I don’t win first place.
This is perfect. This whole post. I love it. Though I stand by what I said about the bombs.
Yahweh knows an outrage when he sees one, whether or no it involves a competing deity. ; )
I’m sure he does.
Great blog! But what in the heck is going on with these off topic comments?? Anyways, bookmarked
Off-topic is what we do here. ; )
If there were a topic around here it would be off by a bit.
I don’t wanna sound dumb or anything, but what is a “topic”? ; 0
Must be some sort of alien concept. Certainly not likely to be found in these digs, thank goodness. May make your brain hurt to focus too much.
Focus. Right. I gave up wearing glasses, except to drive, about 18 months ago. So I’ve been in an unfocused period. Probably that’s the problem. If I could focus, I might see a topic. Whatever that is.
Scary thinking. Sounds too much like being a grown up.
What is a “grown up”? Is that like a “topic”?
Danger, Will Robinson. Thin ice ahead. Dangerously close to a “topic.”