One of the legal secretaries journeyed to Utah for the holidays, attending for a week a family reunion. She returned to our shores bearing a vicious plague, which is now Captain Tripsing 
through all and sundry.
I awoke with it this morning, transformed into a veritable fountain of phlegm. I hate years where I can’t even get through the first five days without being felled by some noxious non-wellness.
I know that this plague is from Utah, because I feel a powerful need to stockpile food, accumulate nine wives, and commune with the Angel Moroni.
In an attempt to exorcise this Evil, I am turning to Randy Newman’s immortal Utah chant, “The Beehive State.”
Jeebus save us.
The plague is bad no matter the time of year. Please accept my sincere sympathy. But given my ration of only one episode of the plague per year maybe getting it over early is good.
Best of luck with the recovery. Eat lots of chicken soup.
I am armed with many plague-fighting weapons, having recently prepared gumbo, chili, and cajun blackened chicken. If none of those people can conquer this foul beast, I am most likely Doomed. ; (
Man, do I envy you the diet if not the illness. There are few foods better than fine chili or cajun meats.
Apparently Utah is not only churning out plagues, it is also populated by people who are degenerating into snarling beasts. According to this story, the state’s lieutenant governor and the mayor of Salt Lake City are embarking on a crusade to urge Utahns (extremely strange word, that) “to be more civil, caring, and inclusive.”
According to Lt. Governor Greg Bell:
They have even established a website, in hopes that Utahns will go there, and learn thereby to be less monstrous.
Seems like a good idea for the entire world. We seem to be drifting into the divided realm with no middle ground or reason for acceptance of others. We humans are in so many ways our own worst enemies.